never again.

NOte To Self: Post-Its are cool, but stick they do not when you're caught in the thronging masses of squealing girls with a complete and blatant disrespect for my need of personal space.

i am pissed because a girl who was completely NORMAL except for a lousy showercap got picked and i didn't because everybody was squishing me. that is the lowest. pft. i was covered in over 700++ Post-Its and no, not even a look. i had a bloody METAL bucket on my head. Cello??
grk. it was all fun and fine when we were sticking the Post-Its on me. it was really funny. and i had all these corny/lame/dirty one-liners spilling out of my mouth and when i hopped, all the Post-Its shook and i look like [as my friend so readily pointed out] a short Big Bird. it was FUNNY ok and i caught somebody sneaking a shot of me on her Exilim. i WANT that camera. but no matter.

honestly, what really got me was all the shoving i received. i hated it. i got claustrophobic and seriously PISSED. like, i need to breathe?? gerroff me! fuck. never again.
but i suppose it was good i experienced the Crowds now at a roadshow then sometime in the future at a concert i paid $100 to attend and realize im not having a good time cuz im getting crushed. yes.

huh. and i realized something was wrong with me when Utt appeared and i appeared to be the only one not caught up in the mass hysteria. hrm. i'm a do-crazy-stuff-in-public person, but not really shrieking-in-public person...unexpectedly. i thought i was, and yet i'm not. the only screaming i did was to try and get them to PICK me so i could get out of the friggin; crowd. and half and hour after he appeared and after i lost about 50% of my hearing capabilities, i realized how STUPID it all was.

it's just a guy. coincidentally a cuter than the average cute guy but it was ONLY him. and all these girls were shrieking at him, telling him how hot he was and that he has a cute butt and...well throwing themselves at him. i realized how sad and pathetic it was getting. and i especially realized how this was all inflating his most probably already inflated ego and that dearies, was what really made me feel sick. i wanted to tell them to you know, to just get a grip but they wouldn't have paid attention to me anyways. so, i valiantly continued my attempts to get picked to make the entire thing at least worth it (and the $60).

i'm not sure whether i've mentioned it earlier but if you asked me again to parade covered in 700++ POst-Its with a bucket on my head down Orchard Road, yes i will. a LOUD resounding yes. but never, ever at a mob-like roadshow. or any mob. ever.
no.
NO.

NEVER.